Organizing my life.

For the first time since early college, I have a phone book. I also have a birthday and anniversary book. I will finally send you cards, all of you.

This being said, I have not kept track of birthdays, and never of anniversaries (not even my own), since early college. That would be 1996. You might want to remind me. Gently.

If I have never called you, it may also mean that I don't know your phone number.

If you haven't gotten a Christmas card, I probably don't know your address.

Eleven years later, I re-enter the adult world.

I am surprised any of you speak to me.

Warning: Cell Phone Stalking

I recently discovered that I married a stalker. His name is Adam, you may know him.

I received a bluetooth head piece for Christmas, and it is wonderful. I can call someone with one push of a button. My cell phone never has to leave my purse. I always hear the phone ring.

The honeymoon ended though. I had talked to Adam about some random thing while at Sam's Club. We had said our goodbyes as I approached the check out stand. My headpiece automatically disconnects the call when the caller hangs up.

I continued through the line. Made small talk with the cashier, I'm sure. Got a drink at the concession stand, and walked toward the door. If you are familiar with Sam's, you know that this is a lengthy process.

Then Adam starts talking. He never hung up. He just wanted to listen. So he says.

My cell phone bill was more than double this month. How many times did Adam "just listen" I ask? I think this is more than coincidental.

If you speak to Adam, make sure you hang up on him.